Rubbish tips!!!!!!!!!

Plastic bin bags!  They are always a problem, you’ve probably noted.  You always run out at inopportune times and I’m always being told by my environmentally aware new wife Wanda-Ermine that they are bad for the planet!  All these plastic bags flying around makes for an unhappy world, so I put my mind to a tipular solution to both problems!

Instead of using the disposable black bin bags so often associated with crime, litter and the pleasurable sex of bagging, simply use a bed sheet sewn up at the corners!!  This re-usable, highly absorbent binbag will save our world and save you money!  The man in the petrol station who sells me all my Magic Tree air fresheners is now a convert to the system, and after their initial objections, my local bin men have stopped setting fire to my tree!